"The real test of being in the presence of God is, that you either forget about yourself altogether or see yourself as a small, dirty object. It is better to forget about yourself altogether." -C.S. Lewis
That really struck me. I have always thought it is better to see myself as the fallen, too dirty for his light to get through, messed up creature. But its quite the opposite. I need to forget myself entirely.
This will take some getting used to. I have put myself as the main character in this story, but that's deceiving. God is everything, He is center. Yet he has a part for each of us included in this story.
Balance. I don't know how to balance forgetting myself, knowing God loves me, fearing God because he should be feared, talking with God as my closest friend becuase he cares.
"Who is a God like you, who pardons sin and forgives the transgression of the remnant of his inheritance? You do not stay angry forever but delight to show mercy.You will again have compassion on us; you will tread our sins underfoot and hurl all our iniquities into the depths of the sea." -Micah 7:18-19
"I know that you can do all things; no plan of yours can be thwarted. You asked, 'Who is this that obscures my counsel without knowledge?' Surely I spoke of things I did not understand, things too wonderful for me to know. You said, 'Listen now, and I will speak; I will question you, my ears had heard of you but now my eyes have seen you. Therefore I despise myself and repent in dust and ashes." -Job 42:1-6
"Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love." -1 John 4:8
"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails." -1 Corinthians 13:4-8a
God is not the worlds definition of love, he has his own. Incredible.
(forgive the randomness of this post, I am not able to put much editorial gusto behind my thoughts right now...finals are in two weeks.)
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